Hammer Hosts a Horrible Honeymoon with “Kiss of the Vampire” Tonight!

Posted on January 21, 2023

Tonight on MeTV- though it may be too late for Christmas mistletoe and too early for Valentine’s Day, it’s still the perfect time to kiss up to this hot-blooded tale from the British Hammer studios, in which a young couple makes the acquaintance of an aristocratic family that is much more than it seems- ready to deliver the “Kiss of the Vampire”!

The story opens in the early 1900s-at the scene of a burial-where the ceremony is interrupted by a gentleman who appears to be operating in full Van Helsing mode! This is Professor Zimmer, who has suffered a great loss at the hands (and fangs) of a vampire- and now makes it his mission to hunt the evil creatures down and destroy them.

Meanwhile- a young newly-married couple, Gerald and Marianne, are traveling through a remote forest in Bavaria, and run into some car trouble- they find they have run out of gas (yes, they had cars during this era- but obviously not ones with large enough gas tanks!) While they try to find a way to get their car refueled, they find the nearest- and only- place to stay is an inn- not exactly a hotspot, made obvious by the fine layer of dust on everything. It is not very reassuring when the innkeeper’s wife bluntly admits “nobody comes here anymore”! The innkeeping couple seem odd, somewhat secretive, and even fearful. The only other boarder in the place is none other than Prof. Zimmer- who appears to be drowning his pain and remorse with alcohol. When Gerald tries to question him about the secrecy he has noticed, the professor will give no answer- other than to suggest that Gerald takes his wife and get far away as soon as possible!

The young couple, Gerald and Marianne, soon discover that the surrounding area isn’t completely devoid of inhabitants- there is a local powerful aristocrat, Dr. Ravna, who somehow seems well aware of the young couple’s presence. He invites them to dine with his family -son Carl and daughter Sabina at their palatial chateau. In spite of warnings, the couple does so- and, as their visit progresses, the family members watch the couple carefully, plying them with somewhat suspicious drinks, and entertaining them with some strangely hypnotic music. It all culminates in having an effect on the young bride, almost putting her into a trance! There is also an additional family member who keeps out of sight- and has a sinister agenda. The doctor generously offers to arrange for an emergency shipment of petrol to refill their car’s tank- but it may take a while...

Before long there is another invitation to a costume ball at the castle-which will end up sending the young groom into a mad world of denial, as Ravna sets his sights on the bride as the newest recruit for his army of- vampires! Can the somewhat boozy professor step in to help the distraught young man save his fair newlywed wife from becoming one of the undead?

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You know if it’s a Hammer vampire film, there’ll be lurid color, including red blood-and dark sinister action. This 1963 film, also known as “Kiss of Evil”, was another attempt by Hammer to do a vampire film without Dracula- Christopher Lee- much like “Brides of Dracula”. The cast does include Clifford Evans, who will appear on our show soon in an encore of “Curse of the Werewolf”- another Hammer horror- and we’ll have information on him and other cast members, along with segments parodying products of the recent past, including a certain faux feathered friend similar to an “As Seen on TV” product from a few years ago. We also have a parody of a bearded duck-hunting family from down south who would probably try to shoot the previously mentioned winged wonder. Plus, we present a song, a few “Spawn of Svengoolie” auditions, and some vintage Sven segments to round out the show.

“Kiss of the Vampire” plants one on you at 8 pm eastern and pacific, 7 pm central, and check local listings ( or at www.MeTV )for when and where it airs in your area. As always, the hordes of Sven fans will be live-Tweeting during the show on Twitter- and you can join in- just make sure to add the hashtag #svengoolie . In Chicago, viewers will get one more look ( is that possible?!) at “Invisible Man” at 11 am on our main local channel, CW26.

We appreciate that our viewers have been happy to join us for our newly-expanded shows! The reaction has been terrific, and we look forward to having more lengthy films and extra content.

With Valentine’s Day coming up soon, now would be the best time to get a Sven gift for the beloved Sven fan in your life! Check out the ever-growing inventory in our store. (Sigh, YES, I HAVE a store!)

And tonight- pucker up for what we have in store for you on MeTV!

Yikesgeist