13 discontinued cookies you will never eat again
Miss these sweet snacks? That's the way the cookie crumbles.
There is certainly no shortage of options in the cookie aisle. Our grocery stores are packed with upteen varieties of Oreo, Keebler and Chips Ahoy.
Perhaps it is our rose-tinted, er, taste buds, but nothing tastes quite as delicious as our memories of discontinued treats. Cookies of the past were incredible. Plus, before the '90s, we didn't have to be bothered by all that pesky nutrional info.
Previously, we shared 17 bygone candy bars you will never eat again. Take your sweet tooth down memory lane with this baker's dozen of bygone cookies.
1. Almost Home
"Cookies that taste so homemade, you can almost taste the recipe," the slogan proclaimed. Mmm… recipes. Nabisco churned out an entire line of these chewy cookies at the peak of the soft-cookie era, the 1980s.
2. Burry's Gauchos
Akin to a Nutter Butter or the Girl Scout Peanut Butter Sandwich, the Gaucho was one of the three big cookies baked by this New Jersey brand. Actually, it's exactly like the Girl Scouts' sandwiches, as Burry produced them for the troops. Mr. Chips, a chocolate chip cookie, was another popular flavor featuring their cute cartoon characters. (You could bite into the Gaucho Elephant and Mr. Chips with a box of Burryland Stars.)
Image: Flickr / Dan Goodsell
3. Burry's Fudge Town
More from Burry. Would you opt for the traditional sandwich cookie or go all chocolate?
4. Yum Yums
Speaking of Girl Scouts, these sinful coconut caramel bars were not too far off from the beloved Samoas. We're actually kind of glad they were not required to print the calories on the side of this one.
With a teal color scheme straight out of Saved by the Bell, Dunkaroos will make any '90s kid turn all soft inside — as soft as the frosting-like substance in which you dipped your cookies. There's now a cottage industry built around Dunkaroos nostalgia on the internet.
Emojis you could eat! Come to think of it, it's suprising Nabisco hasn't rebranded and relaunched these cookies as "Coojis" or something.
7. Golden Raisin Biscuits
Low on suger and loaded with raisins, Sunshine's Golden Raisin Biscuits (later rebranded and expanded into Golden Fruit) seem like a rather adult cookie — or perhaps something beyond the definition of a cookie. But we ate these by the plank after school. If you're desperate for a bite, imported Crawford's Garibaldi Biscuits are similar.
8. Magic Middles
The ultimate weapon in the great Soft Cookie Wars of the 1980s, these supple sweets were filled with a pocket of chocolate cream. It was almost like eating an unbaked cookie, and we were okay with that.
9. Nabisco Ideal
Let's be real — this was a box of candy bars. In other words: awesome and decadent. The chocolate-covered, peanut butter–filled bars were like a love child (well, parent?) of a Twix and a Girl Scout Tagalong. This ad from the 1960s also promotes the bygone Chocolate Pinwheels Cakes, Minarets Cakes, Creme Wafer Sticks and Fancy Grahams. Ooo, Fancy Grahams!
10. Nabisco Marshmallow Sandwich
Popular in the 1950s and 1960s, these treats were like little whoopies made with Nilla wafers. Yum.
11. Nabisco Snaps
With their cool mod packaging, Snaps pull at all your 1960s-nostalgia heartstrings. Which flavor was your favorite — ginger, chocolate, vanilla?
12. Pepperidge Farm Capri
Once beloved — many might claim these as their favorite PF variety from youth — the Capris are so long gone, it's challenging to find a photo of them. The crunchy, brownie-ish cookie was launched in the 1950s as part of a new line of "royal Belgian recipes," according to the ad.
13. Pepperidge Farm Nassau
Why did some of our favorite Pepperidge Farm cookies go away? Who is running the farm?
Image: Pepperidge Farm / Slate
14. Bonus: All these Girl Scout cookies
Do you remember Kookaburras, Pixies and Juliettes? These are a few of the 7 discontinued Girl Scout cookies we want to come back.
Image: Vintage Girl Scout