What if the cast of M*A*S*H starred in The Lord of the Rings?

A M*A*S*H*up for the ages.

Hear us out: A ragtag band of brothers in arms sent to a far-off land with a mission from some higher power. With destruction all around them, our heroes must mend and heal and push through the conflict to the beauty of friendship on the other side.

Sound familiar? It better! We're describing M*A*S*H AND The Fellowship of the Rings!

To better illustrate some of the parallels, here is a dream casting of The Lord of the Rings starring the cast of M*A*S*H!

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1. Frodo Baggins - Alan Alda

He's our guy. This is the main character. And just like Frodo Baggins, Hawkeye is always at odds, torn between doing the right thing and the thing that feels good. Hawkeye Pierce's One Ring? It's probably a lady. 

2. Gandalf - Harry Morgan

This is the most obvious casting of the entire list. Col. Potter, in his experience, wisdom, and strength of character, is the clear choice for Gandalf. Both of them are veterans of former conflicts. Both take from their past experience a weariness for war. Col. Potter is basically already a wizard.

3. Bilbo Baggins - McLean Stevenson

Lt. Colonel Henry Blake is Bilbo Baggins. They're both only there for the story's beginning. They both seem really nice and then occasionally a personality trait catches you really off guard. They're both, in their current states, ineffectual leaders. Both of them get a big party before we stop seeing them. The difference is Henry Blake dies in a helicopter crash.

4. Gollum - Larry Linville

Major Frank Burns is the perfect Gollum. He's already a bit of a split-personality type, always lusting after his precious. Sometimes he's Smeagol, sometimes he's Gollum; either way, he's the perfect choice for the role.

5. Merry - Wayne Rogers

Merry, just like Trapper John McIntyre, is mostly there for comedic relief. Yes, both of them play a fundamental role in their respective stories, but each is best known for bringing the laughs. Similarly, they're both gone for large portions of their own series! 

6. Mike Farrell - Pippen

Just like Merry, Pippen is there to provide some smiles during the darkness of war. And just like Pippen, B.J. Hunnicutt makes us laugh every time he's onscreen. Can it be any more obvious?

7. Galadriel - Loretta Swit

Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan is a born leader. Both are among the highest-ranking women in their stories. Look... there aren't a lot of girls in The Lord of The Rings OR in M*A*S*H. They've got a few similarities though!

8. Samwise Gamgee - Gary Burghoff

Radar, like Sam, is the one you can most rely on. He might not be the funniest, but he is easily the most dependable. Radar is the only one who really knows what he's doing. And Sam is the hero of our hearts.

9. Aragorn - Jamie Farr

Klinger is Aragorn, the noble and mysterious Strider. He is the Romantic hero, superior in ability and lifespan to those around him. He is the man who would be King.

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Snickers 13 days ago
My god the horror, the horror. Let's just be glad that never happened.
Peter_Falk_Fan 13 days ago
I think Jamie Farr would make a better Galadriel.

None of the picks for the Hobbits would work since Hobbits were between 2 and 4 feet tall. Gary Burghoff comes the closest at 5'5". I agree with Colonel Potter as Gandalf (both 5'6" tall), but mainly Gandalf the White.
Runeshaper 13 days ago
I love LOTR, but this M*A*S*H cast is just not a good idea, IMO.
I love "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy, too. I have "The Return of the King" chess set. We have a lot of figures from that trilogy.
That's cool, man! I love the old Toybiz LOTR figures.
daDoctah 13 days ago
I'd like to see Frank Burns as Gimli: "NOBODY tosses a ferret-face!"
LoveMETV22 13 days ago
Fun story. Perhaps a story in the future with a:
" What if the cast of " The Andy Griffith Show" starred in "The Harry Potter Films?"
"TAGS" has enough characters, it might work, just a thought ! 🤣
That would be interesting.
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